How can I get my friends to stop having kids. It’s ruining my life!?

So, now all of my friends are popping out babies left and right.

Who am I suppose to go out with now? It’s always “Oh,I can’t find a babysitter” or “Oh, little Logan just pooped in the potty for the first time and we’re staying home to celebrate”.

It’s really…

You know they have government labs that you can donate kids too. If you want these people to still be your friends, tell them that you will babysit for them, then quietly take the kids to the drop boxes those government labs have.
And when your friends ask what happened to their kids, just plead ignorance and act like you don’t know what they are talking about. Then just offer them drinks and before you know it you will be in the middle of a drunken orgy trying to decide whether to grab that dudes floppy penis, or that chicks saggy boob.
Kids will be the last thing on anyones mind at that point.

Singles just don’t understand what it’s like to have kids. Yes, your friends will not go out with you as much; the kids require a LOT of attention and energy, more than you can imagine, and of course they won’t want you getting drunk at a kid’s birthday party. In fact, you should not accept those invitations if you feel the need to get drunk there and make an a** of yourself.

You shouldn’t have to convince anyone that you don’t want kids right now, that’s your choice. There is a certain kind of closeness you can have with parents of other children the same age as yours, and it’s nice to be able to share that with your friends. But if you need friends to party with, then go out partying or wherever and strike up conversations with people you think might be good friend material. It’s hard to make new friends but it sounds like that’s what you need to do.

Oh, and it wouldn’t hurt to just be honest with your friends with kids: you need to give them space but also say that you would like, even if it’s just once in a long while, to go out and have fun the way you used to. That way you might have a chance of keeping these friends, in the long term at least.

I sympathise completely
(((Tectonic French Toast (w/syrup) )))

They even have th audacity to have “grown up” parties now !!!
Sitting down eating a meal no single women, large quantities of drink or drugs !!!!

Arg !!! check out this website it is a common problem
What is Adultitis?
Adultitis is a common condition occurring in people between the ages of 21–121, marked by chronic dullness, mild depression, moderate to extremely high stress levels, a general fear of change, and, in some extreme cases, the inability to smile. Patients can appear aimless, discontent, and anxious about many things. Onset can be accelerated by an excess burden of bills, overwhelming responsibilities, or a boring work life. Generally, individuals in this condition are not fun to be around.


Anybody that hates dogs and little kids can’t be all bad. (I always thought W.C. Fields’ insult to dogs was misplaced.) Show them some pictures of the poorer quarters of Bombay, Bangladesh, and Bakersfield. Talk doom and gloom about a 10,000 year mountain of plastic Pampers. If that doesn’t do it, your friends are hopeless idiots that shouldn’t be reproducing anyway. I sure know how to suck up for a best answer, lol.

Wow, If you are truly there friend then you would be happy for them starting a family. If you just want people to party with, they are a dime a dozen, find some new party friends. Telling someone they can’t have kids or a family cause it would ruin your Friday night partying is pretty darn selfish! Actually, I have never heard anything more selfish.

Wow – you have weird friends.

I managed to find friends who don’t like their kids very much. On top of that, my one childless friend has it in her head that she wants to have kids and is always offering to take my kid for the day so I can run errands and stuff. Obviously your friends are just too nice. You must be a nice person too… I just don’t know anything about those sorts of things.

Get your childless friends to babysit for your friends who have kids. That should convince anyone that kids are a bad idea.

you have selfish friends. Nothing can be done to change a selfish person’s mind…the best I can suggest is give their kids a puppy for christmas and then sit back and have fun watching the parents have to deal with cleaning up poop and walking it or worse trying to return it while the kid cries his eyes out.

Yeah, I can empathize. I rarely see my best friend because her sons consume so much of her time. I wish she’d just ship the little bastards off to military school already.

Do you ask this melodramatic question every time one of them gets pregnant?

You are one of the smartest trolls of the bunch, but even you have some pathetically sad attempts at humor. I am disappointed.

get new friends. why? well, they have their own lives now, so how should they fit in any time for you when they are first-time parents who obsess over their kids.

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