I know its really bad, but I truly hate my life. I hate where I live, I hate my family we always have problems and there is hardly anything to eat in our apartment which is gross and noisy, I hate school I am doing crappy because I can’t study at home, I DESPISE GYM CLASS especially because everyone picks on …
I don’t know how old you are… I would guess 15 or 16… and your life… really… is more normal than you know… Half the kids in the hall are itchy in their skins and want to scream most of the time because life is so frustrating.
I’m so sorry you are depressed. Sometimes, frankly, life just plain sucks… But… this too shall pass. I promise you… the problems associated with school, and classes, and boys, and zits and social problems… I SWEAR are temporary!!!
You are a beautiful soul. God is there for you…. Your soul has a body, not the other way around… and your soul is here to learn, experience and love, and it will happen for you…
I suggest working out as a physical release…
Then…try the writing again… express this hurt and anger… express it in drawing. Gone are the days of drawing smiley faces and flowers… for now… paint something angry and red… draw something with so much force you rip through the paper… it’s cathartic…
Then… on the other side, as you learn to experience life and to express your hurt and anxiety… the sun shines through… and you will again draw flowers… and you will find friends who love you
Also, you may want to use some of this energy to help others… Sounds odd, but I know from personal experience it’s rewarding to do something that is bigger than yourself..
Mom’s have unconditional love… talk to her more…
I’m sending my love to you… and you are in my thoughts this evening… praying you will soon find peace and happiness.
I have dealt with depression for a very long time and I’ve even gone through a number of Psychiatrist and therapist, too. I found out one thing through all that and that’s not all Psychiatrist and therapist are equal, and sometimes it takes a while to find the right one for you. However, sometimes you do have to give them a chance, too. So, you can’t pass judgment right away.
Generally speaking, Psychiatrist basically handle your medication management – it’s why they usually don’t spend too much time with you after your diagnoses. Most of the real work is done by you with the help of your therapist.
Anyway, as I was saying I saw a Psychiatrist and a therapist several years ago and I thought I was better, so I stopped seeing them. Unfortunately, I was wrong and and I didn’t find out until I fell into a very deep depression and did try to kill myself around 3 + years ago now.
As a result, I ended up in the hospital, then when I got discharged I self-admitted into a behavioral hospital, where I was a resident for about a week. After that I self-admitted into their day program, where I attended classes from 9AM to 4PM M-F for almost 6 months. During that time I was still under the care of my new Psychiatrist and before I left the program I got setup with a private therapist associated with my Psychiatrist office. I am still on the same medication as I was 3 years ago, but I’m no longer suicidal like I was back then. I still suffer from depression and my other issues, but it’s not quite as intense all the time or for as long.
If you are feeling suicidal and think you are going to act upon those feelings, then you need to get help imediately – even if it means going to the emergency room or calling 911. I don’t know your age, but if you are real young you might want to let your parents know what’s going on, because maybe they can help you.
I hope this helps.
You first need confidence. If you think you are ugly then you can always change the way you look to improve yourself. If you break out then get acne cream or just good face wash and drink lots of water. Also if you can’t study at home then go to the closet library or even the one in your school. I’ve experienced depression couple times throughout my life because of the pressure I get from my family but now I am doing okay because I realized I shouldn’t care too much about anything. I find that if you care too much then you get more stress. Just take it easy and start drawing again. It takes up a lot of time and really helps in relieving strress.. Good luck
Suicide doesn’t change anything. Only you can. I’m sure if you reach out to someone you know and tell them you’re at your breaking point and make no bones about it, help will come. Ask a friend if you can study at their house. When your at school and at gym class, think positive. People will respond to your positive energy. Be an inspiration to them. When people see that you can overcome adversity, and you absolutely can, they will respect you. When they see that you won’t stand for people being mean to you and bullying you, they will respect you. Respect will lead to new friendships. And they will be of the truest kind. Friendships based on looks or social status don’t last and they are not healthy. The friendships you have potential to develop will last a lifetime and they will be a positive influence on everyone. Please, never ever give up hope. The spring of hope flows eternally.
Listen, your baby isn’t even aware of anything at this point. It can’t be scared and will have no concept or understanding of even existing. Yes you’re too young to have a child, especially if you can’t raise or take care of it, but killing yourself does nothing. Since you believe in god and heaven why not just wait and live your life until you die of natural causes? You’ll be with it eventually regardless. Honestly it sounds like you’re really not thinking clearly and need some help. Talk to someone ASAP.
Your not stupid. You just have a lot of built up feelings that you dont want to let out. I feel the same way you do. My mom only wants me for a child support check and my dad doesn’t want me. I want to die everday too but then I think about people I love and that love me like my 4 year old brother and 1 month old sister. Me and my 17 year old sister are always at eachothers throats. People say **** about me too and say im shy and it bothers me alot. I am so self concious, and always feel ugly.
Just hang in there you will be able to get away when your 18. killing yourself won’t help any sistuation
Don’t worry, there’s no such thing as god.
You have the power to do anything you want in your life. Drawing and writing? Those things are brilliant! If you can practice with them you will be extremely successful when you’re older. You could be a graphic novel artist/writer, you could make films, you could illustrate or paint or… well, the list goes on. Keep working at it.
It doesn’t matter how many friends you have, but rather the quality of the ones you do have.
Why do you fight with your brothers and sisters? Find the source and talk to them about it. Tell them you’re worried about it.
Who enjoys going to high school anyway? Learning new things is important though, so try your best.
I think you’re just getting a bit worked up with anxiety. Calm down, drink some herbal tea and do something you enjoy.
You’ve only got one shot at life, might as well make the most of it.
In response to other peoples answers:
If you are weak willed, then pray. If you are not, then act.
schools have counselors, maybe trying try talking to one of them and they’ll keep it private. I was in your situation back in 9th grade, but i pulled it around. maybe you can find a private school somewhere those are always better than public schools. I hated public school. i just enedd up going to a private school run by a bunch of hippies and they really helped me put a good slant on life. i’ve come to realize hat yes life sux sometimes, but it’s our disposition and attitude towards it that makes it better. You really need to try to not let others get to you, its hard i know when you have to be around it every damn day bt for the sake of you and your family you shoudl really try hard to look past the small things and look at the bigger picture. as for studying see if you can join some study groups to help and you may even make some better friends there. sounds like the friends you currently have aren’t very good ones. the group you hang with makes all the difference. i’m praying for you, do the right things and work on bettering yourself. 🙂 your not stupid your a good person you can do this.
you need to be a trooper. There are plenty of people in the world who have it way worse and still live. this may sound harsh but you need to hear it. Be diffrent, first take a good look at yourself and clean your image up anyway to make yourself look better. Second branch out, you dont only have to make friends at school there are plenty of kids everywhere that you can become friends with. People who mess with you are only loosers who have nothing better to do. Try and have a bigger social life, a job would be good. THis gives you money for food and to spend onyourself to enjoy. Just remember killing yourself wont help just proves your weak and cant push through it.
Taking your life is never the answer.
Just think of how your family would react, it would break their hearts.
If you can’t study at home, go to the local library, or even just a local park.
Also, just remember that it won’t always be like that, for example, many hollywood actors have had poor childhoods and look what they have done with their lives. You just have to really want a better life & take the step in achieving it.
Hope that helps ♥